So, you know how you see other people’s pictures on Facebook and Instagram, and you think to yourself, “Wow- their life just looks so great. How dreamy!” I may be fooling you with our pictures to the pumpkin patch, but let me tell you that while it may LOOK like we had this amazing fall afternoon, it was a little more traumatizing than it appears.
First, when I google-mapped ourselves to the pumpkin patch earlier in the week, it estimated 54 minutes. Perfecto! We can handle a 54 minute car ride. Well, 97 minutes later, we arrive at our destination. That is almost DOUBLE the amount of time I anticipated.
We pull into the parking lot, and of course, I have to go to the bathroom. I spy the only option across the parking lot: Porto-Potty. There is a long story from my cross-country coaching days that led to my nickname of “Snoot” because I was apparently too “Snooty” to use the Porto-Potty’s at the meets and would avoid anything that resembled a liquid until I returned safely to civilization. And here is why: if you are a female, you are NOT going to sit down, and the alternative is that you get an amazing quad workout while holding your breath to avoid passing out and crashing your head into the door while wondering whether or not the toilet paper is safe to use. It’s horrible. I gave in and returned to the car a few minutes later to begin our pastoral pumpkin adventure.
It was VERY sunny, which for babies, is not a good thing, so I hopped from shady patch to shady patch, scanning the pumpkin yard for cute photo spots. We did our best to find a few (enter the photos you see here), but between each photo I was scanning the sky, locating the sun, and doing everything I could to shield her sweet little face from all those UVA/UVB rays. Meanwhile, we try to pick out our pumpkins. It turns out we can pick out ONE pumpkin since one of us has to carry the pumpkin while the other one carries Evie. We go to check out, and now my stomach is grumbling. Need food. Long story short, I shove down some too salty popcorn while simultaneously feeding Evie in the picnic area. I look from table to table as families spread out their bountiful picnics. Why didn’t I think of that? Maybe at the apple orchard, we can buy ourselves a delicious fried apple pie? That would really do the trick.
We never made it to the apple orchard. It was only 15 minutes away, but for some reason unbeknownst to us, EVERYONE IN GEORGIA was trying to get to this exact Apple Orchard (I later discover it was the Apple Festival or something like that). Traffic was backed up for miles, and then…. it started. Evie starts making these little complaints once she realizes the car is not moving. They quickly escalate to not a piercing cry, but a scary cry. She is SO angry that her cry no longer makes noise. Instead, it is a really disturbing gurgling sound and I imagine her eyeballs popping out of her head due to her rage. I hop in the backseat and start making animal noises and singing the Itsy Bitsy Spider at the top of my lungs. It works for a second here or there, but mostly, she will have none of it, and proceeds to flip out. We are a 1/2 mile away. I can almost see the entrance. And then, I beg Ryan. “PLEASE TURN AROUND!!!!!!” He looked back at me. Was I serious? Just a moment ago I had told him to forge ahead- we could do it, and now, I was all of a sudden at my wit’s end. But it was true. I had had enough and Evie had ruined the orchard for me. Instead, we turn around, finally get lunch at McDonald’s where I eagerly order my apple pie to satisfy my craving, and we drove home in silence, exhausted from meltdown. Of course, guess what Evie is doing. Snoozing happily in the backseat. Typical.
So there ya have it. Now you know why I had to make these cookies.
Maple Coconut Pecan Cookies
2 cups + 2 Tbsp flour
1 cup brown sugar
1/2 cup granulated sugar
12 Tbsp butter, melted and then cooled
1 egg + 1 egg yolk
2 tsp vanilla
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
3/4 cup shredded sweetened coconut
3/4 cup pecans
2 Tbsp maple syrup
First, cream together the butter and sugars. Add the eggs and vanilla and mix thoroughly. Meanwhile, combine the dry ingredients in a separate bowl and add to the wet mixture. Finally, add in the coconut, pecans, and maple syrup. Bake at 325F for 13-15 minutes. Enjoy!
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